Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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