I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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