No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
