wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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