tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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