this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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