glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize