Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I would fuck him just for his dog
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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