Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
