"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
