just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
