i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
