Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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