There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
