I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Enjoy the penises
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
