Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize