Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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