I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
