i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
foreskin is a definite game changer
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
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