i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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