he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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