I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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