youre lurking in front of me
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
