People with herpes should wear stickers.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
