I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
