next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
