No, you can still breathe under the balls.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
