It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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