I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
