he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
