gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Say something about gay babies.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
