Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
