A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize