Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
