After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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