I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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