he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
