Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize