sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
