Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
