Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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