was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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