trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
