she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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