ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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