I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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