I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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