I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I am available for nakedness
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize