i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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