ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
