Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
