his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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